when i grow up...

I was sitting on the couch yesterday morning, putting on my heals for work, and I said to Alexis, "These are such a pain to have to wear. Are you going to be a business woman like mommy?" Suddenly my mind started shooting in all different directions thinking about what she could/would be when she grows up.

It is obviously WAY too early to start to thinking like that, but we do start awfully young with that concept, don't we? Once children start dressing up, possibly like firemen, nurses, or police officers, they begin to be exposed to the idea of deciding on a career at a young ago. It's interesting, of course, that those are the few choices you have as a child...service folks that are gender biased. Of course fairy and cowboy costumes are available, but both of those suggest much larger lifestyle choices that we definitely can't touch on yet at that age, right?

When you start to progress though elementary school and junior high, the pressure begins. "You need to do well if you want to get a good job someday." And then college. A major needs to be selected at 18 that determines the knowledge you will learn to prepare yourself for what you think you want to be when you grow up. At the same time, you're also told, "You can be anything you want to be. Just follow your dreams."

I hear my dad telling my brother that line (he's in his second year of college), and I even find myself pushing that same thing on the poor sophomore. But then I tell my dad, and myself, that he can't hear us right now or understand it. We're all told this at that age, but none of us "get it". I don't think you can "get it" until you're out of school, beginning a career, and then realizing that you are or aren't in the right place.

I do want Alexis to dream. I want her to enjoy learning and learn about things in all different fields. I want her to be comfortable with herself so that she can be confident in the decisions she makes. I want Jamie and I to be confident in her ability to make decisions, and hope that we raise her in a way that makes her feel like she'll be accepted by us, no matter what. I know it'll be tough. I'll want to say the same things to her that I heard, even though I know it'll fall on selectively deaf ears. That's just how it goes. Maybe her nurse's uniform costume will stay with her until she jumps into the "big kid" world (I consider myself to still be a part of that), and as long as that makes her happy, it'll make us happy. Let's just hope the nurse's costume doesn't translate into something she wears on a stage that has a pole. But I did say I'd be accepting of her dreams...